


Sebastian and Xavier.

by rabbitking1



Category: Actor RPF, Canadian Actor RPF, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Angst, Bisexuality, Closeted, Feels, Fluff, Gay, Love, M/M, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-12-06
Packaged: 2020-10-14 22:16:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20608226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rabbitking1/pseuds/rabbitking1
Summary: Xavier Dolan still has a crush on Sebastian Stan. Sebastian will never like him that way back though, right?





	1. Nice to meet you again.

**Author's Note:**

> Set in 2019
> 
> This will probably be the closest Xavier will ever be getting together with Seb lol.
> 
> Just harmless fun, if you don't like then don't read. Simple :)

Xavier always found Hollywood parties tiresome. Sure he enjoyed them when he was in the right mood but the truth was he just wasn't tonight. It was common for a celeb to host a party but the truth is 2019 has seen so many that Xavier has forgot who tonight's host is. He met a few people he recognised but so far kept mostly to himself. He went to get a drink 'Probably the last one and then i'll leave' he thought.

He got a drink and drank it quickly. 'Right, time to get going' he thought as he started to make his way to leave. He said bye to some of the other guests and other he politely asked to move as they were so drunk they didn't even know they were in his way. As he was about to leave the front door until he heard a familiar voice shout behind him.

"Hey Xavier! I was told you were here, where are you going?"

"Hi Jessica. I was just leaving, see you soo-"

"No!" She quickly interrupted. "I've just seen you, come with me and hang out." And before he could say a word, Xavier's hand was taken by Jessica's as she dragged him to the upstairs to the back of the second floor.

Xavier had no idea where Jessica was taking him. The pair suddenly stopped and Xavier's eyes widen when they met a man-Sebastian Stan.

"Oh hi Sebastian, fancy seeing you here!" Said Jessica.

Sebastian looked confused and replied "What are you on about? We've been talking all ni-" Jessica ran to silence him and whispered something in his ear, earning a blush from Sebastian.

"I just gotta take a phone call, i'll leave you two be" She said as she ran off downstairs. For some reason Xavier didn't believe she was actually taking a phone call.

It was now really awkward. Xavier was standing next to his crush! Xavier fancied a lot of people but Sebastian was his number one crush. 'Ugh why did he always have to fancy the straight guys?'

Xaiver snapped out of his thoughts when Sebastian coughed and said "Hey dude, cool seeing you here tonight."

Xavier stuttered in response "Err...thanks...you too!"

Sebastian smiled "Want to go and talk on the balcony? It's pretty loud in here."

"Yes! I mean um...yeah sure." Xaiver responded a little bit too enthusiactically. He mentally cursed himself.

The two stepped on the quiet balcony. For some reason Xavier felt nervous but calmed when Sebastian broke the silence "I mean it, it's cool seeing you again. We don't hang out that much, I have fun when we do."

Xavier replied "Me too, remember the 'I, Tonya' premiere?"

Sebastian smiled "Yeah that was one of the funnest nights I can remember, you were great company."

Xaiver blushed 'Don't be too obvious!' He thought.

Xavier then asked "So how have you been? Jessica told me all summer how much fun she had filming with you."

Sebastian replied "Yeah it was so much fun, she's such a great laugh and i'm really proud of the movie. I've been quite busy as i've just come back from the 'TIFF' festival promoting a film and i've got that Disney+ series to start filming soon. What about you? I know you were in 'IT Chapter two', Jessica told me about when were filming together."

"Yeah 'IT' was fun. Directing will always be my passion but i'm kinda glad i'm doing more acting, it makes things interesting. We should do a project together" Xavier let slip.

But thankfully Sebastian seemed to agree "Yeah it's about time we worked on something together! It's definitely something we need to talk about."

Xavier blushed again, 'Ugh why does he have to be so fit?!'

An hour had passed and it was very obvious Jessica wasn't coming back but the boys didn't seem to pass as they were having a great time talking. They spent the hour talking about different topics including their work schedule, mutual friends and their interests.

Out of nowhere, Sebastian said "You know, I kinda miss your instagram flirting" he cheekily smiled.

Xavier stuttered "Yeah...I hope it didn't...freak you out."

"No dude don't worry it was fine, kinda honoured to be honest. Do you really think i'm that good looking?" Sebastian asked, raising his eyebrows.

Xavier replied looked worried. 'What do I say?!' He thought.

Sebastian chuckled "Don't worry pal i'm just messing with you."

Xavier sighed in relief.

Sebastian changed subject "So...you dating anyone now?"

Xavier was surprised by the question but still replied with "No, I haven't got the best track record with relationships. I was actually talking with my friends about this the other day, they all kept saying it's about time I found someone. I need to find someone who's brave for putting with me though!" He chuckled.

Sebastian giggled "I know what you mean. Now that i'm 37, my Mother keeps saying it's time I settled down, I just need to find the right person though."

A few more minutes passed and Sebastian asked Xavier "Wanna go out somewhere soon?"

Xavier mentally squeeled with excitement, "Huh!?" He asked.

Sebastian nervously stammered "I mean...as we both said...we should hang more and I kinda miss seeing you...but only if you want."

Xavier replied quickly "No, that would be great! You're right, I miss hanging out too and it'd be a good chance to catch up."

Sebastian looked relieved "That's great, I'll message you when?"

Xavier nodded. He later quickly glanced at his phone and saw the time "Shit, I gotta go."

Sebastian looked disappointed "Oh."

Xavier began to walk away, but quickly said to Sebastian "It was great to meet you again Sebastian! See you soon!" Xavier had butterflies in his stomach when he saw Sebastian smile and wave him off.

As Sebastian was walking down the stairs, thoughts entered his mind, 'Okay calm down, it's not a date, it's just two friends hanging out, he's straight and will never like you that wayso just deal with it!'

As he was about to leave the building, he bumped into Jessica.

"Oh hi again Xavier! Sorry I didn't return but was busy talking to someone, you have fun?"

Xavier tried to look normal but Jessica could tell he was happy as he said "Yeah, just been chatting with Seb."

"Awwwwww, still have a crush?"

"Oh come on Chastain he's fit as fuck, of course I do!"

Jessica giggled and said "I knew you still liked him, it's cute. He actually asked about you a lot when we were filming this year."

"HE DID!?"

Jessica laughed "Oh my god, you so fancy the guy! Xavier is in love!" She teased.

Xavier rolled his eyes "And on that note I'm going." The two hugged as he left the building.

As Xavier was on his way home, he couldn't stop thinking about Sebastian. He and Sebastian don't interact much but when they do they instantly clicked. Sebastian was definitely Xavier's type but Xavier was not Sebastian's type. Xavier sighed 'Why is it always the straight guys?'

As Xavier went to bed that night, he still thought of Sebastian, 'Oh god, this crush is never going away.'


	2. Dinner.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Xavier and Sebastian go out to have dinner. Just as friends ("definitely" not a date!)

Xavier was waiting at the restaurant Sebastian texted him to meet. Xavier had dressed smartly (but not too smartly, it's not like this is a date right!?) and was fiddling with his sleeves to calm down the nerves.

A few minutes later, he jumped when he felt a hand tap his shoulder. "Oh shit!" He yelled.

"Sorry!" Sebastian chuckled, "probably shouldn't of sneaked up on yo like that. Was very funny though."

"You look goo" Xavier let slip. 'Holy shit, why can't I ever keep my mouth shut?'

Sebastian simply smiled and said "Thanks." He then quietly whispered "You too."

Xavier then said "So shall we go in?"

Sebastian replied with "Yes, after you."

The two sat down in a restaurant that was unlike anything Xavier had ever seen before. "How did you know about this place?" He asked.

Sebastian replied "Came here for a friend's birthday a while back, I love it here."

Xavier could see why. It was a wonderful sight and the menu was already making his belly rumble.

After the two ordered their starters, mains, desserts and drinks, they began to talk about their work.

"So I really want to work on a film with you" Sebastian said.

"Really?" Xavier smiled.

Sebastian smiled back and said "Of course, i've been wanting to for a while. I love you work, 'I Killed My Mother' and 'Mommy' in particular are brilliant. I really admire your work.

Xavier tried his best not to blush. "Okay, I've got a few ideas for some scripts in the works, i'll let you know when I think i've found the right character for you to play.

Sebastian said "Thanks!"

As the two spent the night eating their delicious meal, they changed the subject of their conversation to their more personal lives.

"So it must be exciting you're getting you're own Disney+ show?" Asked Xavier.

Sebastian responded "Yeah, I still can't believe i'm part of the Marvel franchise. The show is gonna have a great cast and crew and I get to work with Anthony Mackie again which is great, he's such a great dude."

"Can you give me some spoilers?" Xavier cheekily asked.

Sebastian laughed "You're going to have to try harder than that!"

As the two were finishing their main course, Xavier noticed Sebastian glance to a table on the far left side of the room. Two women were holding each other's hands and after a while gave each other a loving kiss.

"The look so in love" Sebastian commented.

"Yeah." Xavier agreed.

Sebastian's next question surprised Xavier "Do you want that? A relationship like that?"

Xavier said "Yes, of course."

Sebastian continued "Those girls clearly love each other but there are still a lot of assholes who will give them hell because of their love. Did you ever get hate fore being openly gay?"

Xavier honestly wasn't expecting the conversation to end up like this, but answered anyway "Of course, I still do."

Sebastian said another question that surprised Xavier "Would you like a relationship like that? One in which you can be affectionate without giving a fuck on what other people think?"

Xavier nodded "Yes, I just need to find the right guy."

Sebastian replied with "You deserve it."

After a few seconds of silence, Sebastian spoke up again "You're so brave for being an out celebrity. It's not fair that there's so many out there who are scared of being who they are," And at has he said that, Xavier noticed sadness in Sebastian's eyes.

"You alright?" Xavier asked with concern.

Sebastian tried to play cool "Me? Yeah, yeah dude i'm fine."

Xavier just presumed he made a mistake and that he was reading too much into it.

Xavier then said "I know one day everyone will be able to love whoever they want to with peace. And if there are any celebs who want to come out then I hope they do it when they feel comfortable, but if they do they're such a brave person."

Sebastian smiled sweetly.

It was the end of the meal and after a while squabbling, the two agreed to split the bill. They thanked the staff and went outside, where a taxi was waiting for Sebastian.

"You gonna be alright man?" Sebastian asked.

"Yeah I will, my taxi is due in five minutes."

"I had so much fun tonight Xavier, we should do this more often."

Xavier was blushing and had to conceal a moan when Sebastian gave him a hug. Xavier may or may not have rested his chin on Sebastian's shoulder.

"See you soon pal" Sebastian said as he got into the taxi. Xavier waved off as the taxi drove away.

As Xavier waited for his taxi, he kept thinking about happy being in Sebastian's company made him. 'It's just a crush!' Xavier thought. 'It's just a crush!'


	3. Feelings.

One week later from his dat-I mean night out with Sebastian, Xavier couldn't stop thinking of both the man and how much he enjoyed his company. "It's just a crush" Xavier would repeat to himself dozens of times a day, so why would this feeling never go away? He never felt this way about anyone before and it was scaring him. He just wanted to know why this crush wouldn't go away.

His phone vibrated and Xavier saw that he got a instagram notification-Sebastian has liked one of his posts. Pathetic as it sounds, Xavier would always blush and get butterfly in tummy when Sebastian noticed him.

Xavier had woken up from a nap to hear his phone ringing-it was a call from Jessica.

He answered the call and without a hello, Jessica instead cut to the chase "So I heard you went on a date with Sebastian!"

Sebastian rolled his eyes "It was NOT a date."

"Sure hun."

"How did you even know about this?"

"He told me about it yesterday, said how much fun he had with you and wants to do it again."

"HE DID!?"

Jessica laughed "Oh my god, you have so fallen for him!"

"I HAVE NOT!"

"Oh cool, Sebastian is approaching my house."

Xavier squealed "He is! Tell him I said hi!"

Jessica roared with laughter "Ha ha, I fooled you! He isn't here, I just said that to prove a point and boy I did, you 'like like' him."

Xavier scowled "That was a really cruel trick Jessica."

Jessica replied sweetly "Sorry hun but it proved my point, you haven't felt this way about someone before haven't you?"

"It doesn't matter Jessica, there's one problem-HE'S STRAIGHT!"

Even though they were talking by phone, Xavier could see Jessica frown as she said "Ah, i'd forgotten about that. But maybe he's bisexual? I mean he's a very private man and he never talks about his relationships that much, heck there are so many celebs in the world that are secretly LGBT, I can name many people in Hollywood who have convinced the world that they are straight but have secretly had a same sex partner for many years. In fact many celebs who are married secretly have same sex partners."

Xavier responded "I know there a lot of closeted celebrities out there, but I got a perfect gaydar Jessica, he's definitely straight, it's so painfully obvious that you could see it from space. Trust me you just need to search it on the internet and you know how much into women he is."

"Maybe you should just have a chat with him and be honest, can't hurt to try surely?" Jessica suggested.

Xavier started to freak out "NO WAY! I was lucky that with me openly having a crush on him didn't freak him out, imagine what will happen when he finds out i'm starting to develop feelings for him?! Plus i've been having a good friendship with him lately and I don't want to risk that, I don't want him to be freaked out by me."

Jessica sighed "Oh come on Xavier you know Sebastian, he won't be freaked out and I know he'll still want to be friends with you, he won't stop talking about you lately! Sebastian is one of the kindest people out there, you know he won't act like a douche to you."

"Yeah, he is kind."

A few seconds later, Jessica said "I gotta go sweetie, talk soon?"

"Of course, talk soon Jessica."

Xavier as bored so he just spent the evening on his phone, checking messages and posts and also browsing etc. It made him happy to see that Sebastian had texted him. The two had texted a lot over the past few weeks and it was always a highlight for Xavier. Xavier smiled as he read the text message.

'Hey pal, you good?' The text read.

Xavier texted back 'Yeah, just in bed chilling, you?'

'Yeah same, you been up to much lately?'

'No not really, you?'

'Nah, that's actually why I texted you, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out again soon in a few days?'

Xavier squealed and punched his fist in the air in celebration before texting back 'Sure! I'd love to.'

Sebastian texted back 'Great! I've missed you buddy. I'll let you know as soon as i'm free, see you soon! :)'

'See you soon!' Xavier texted back. He then proceeded to jump up and down on the bed excitedly like a five year old kid at Christmas. Seabstian asked him to hang out again! Sebastian said he missed him! Sebastian gave him a smiley face!

'Oh shit' Xavier thought, 'My feelings are getting stronger again.'

Xavier went to sleep and dreamt once again of him and Sebastian. His dreams were always happy. He would dream of holding hands with Sebastian, hugging Sebastian and kissing Sebastian.

Xavier woke up in the morning and remembered the dream. "Holy fuck, i'm falling hard for this guy."


	4. First kiss.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian invites Xavier around to his house.

A few days later and Xavier received a text from Sebastian asking if he wanted to come and visit Sebastian's house. Of course Xavier replied yes (a little too eagerly).

Xavier had spent all morning panicking over what he should wear, before realising that they were just friends and that this was not a date. Still, he showered twice, combed his hair and wore his favourite clothes, he just wanted to look nice is all.

He took a taxi to the address Sebastian texted him and approached the door. Why was he so nervous? Why was he walking so slowly? Why was he shaking? Xavier forced himself to forget his nerves and ring the doorbell. Quicker than he expected, a smiling Sebastian opened the door to greet him, (Xavier wondered if Sebastian had been waiting by the door for a while, then realised how stupid he was thinking).

"Hi mate" Sebastian beamed at him, "So glad you could make it." Sebastian's face then showed worry, "Oh, are you alright? Have I done something wrong?"

'YOU ARE SO FUCKING STUPID!' Xavier thoughts screamed. Xavier realised he was being silent because of how smitten he is, and now realised he had gotten Sebastian all worried. "No, no Sebastian! You have done nothing wrong! I'm just being silly, had a long night is all" he said giving a goofy smile to show Sebastian he really was fine earning a giggle from Sebastian and oh Xavier loved that giggle. But it was his smile he loved the most.

"That's a relief, I was kinda worried I did something wrong."

"No of course not." Xavier breathed.

"That's good, I would hate to upset you." And as Sebastian finished that sentance, Xavier's cheeks were gaining a faint blush.

"Come on in buddy" Sebastian said. Xavier didn't need to be told twice.

"Red or white?" Sebastian asked.

"White please" Xavier answered.

"Cool, just wait here, I won't be long."

Xavier sat on the couch and look around the room. It was really nice, Xavier noticed a big TV, a coffe table in fron of him and Photos on the walls of Sebastian's life were what stood out to him the most. Most was of him and his family but he noticed some celebrities and other of Sebastian on set filming.

"Here you go pal" Sebastian returned and handed Xavier his drink.

"Thanks, you have a great home here" Xavier replied.

Sebastian smiled "Thanks."

Xavier was nervous, what should he say? How should he continue the conversation?

Thankfully, it was Sebastian who spoke next, "You been up to much lately pal?"

Xavier sighed in relief "Well..."

And for the next few hours, the two were engrossed in conversation and went back and forth in replies. Xavier was having a lot of fun and it looked like Sebastian was too.

"Wait so Tom Holland really spoils the Marvel movies?"

"YES! Me and everyone else on set always teases him for letting slip major spoilers, it's hilarious." Sebastian chuckled. "Not as funny as your Bill Skarsgard story though."

"Look Pennywise costume or not, I would totally still would do Bill Skarsgard" Xavier joked, earning a loud laugh from Sebastian who was now holding his sides in a fit of laughter.

It was getting late, the clock on Sebastian's wall showed so and so did the nighttime sky out of the window. Xavier was having so much fun though and really didn't want to leave. He also noticed that Sebastian had stopped talking, he had to find a way to continue the conversation and quickly. He noticed a photo on the wall of Sebastian getting his cheek kissed by a girl. "Who's that?" Xavier asked.

Sebastian seemed to tense at that question "Oh, um she was an ex-girlfriend, just friends now."

"You currently seeing someone at the moment?" 'Damnit! Shouldn't of asked such a personal question' Xavier thought.

Sebastian answered nervously "No, I don't think I can date anyone went there's someone out there I like."

Xavier was surprised, and without thinking asked "Oh, anyone I know?"

Sebastian now looked incredibly nervous "Oh...um...yeah I suppose you do. I don't really know how to tell them though, I want to but i'm kinda scared to be honest, I just hope they feel the same" He said giving Xavier a glance. Sebastian then gave Xavier a knowing look, but Xavier remained clueless.

Then out of nowhere, Sebastian leaned in and gave a long kiss to Xavier. Xavier couldn't believe it, was this really happening?! Sebastian then pulled back and started panicking "Oh my god, I'm so sorry Xavier, I shouldn't of done that. It's just that I really liked you and-"he was interrupted by a passionate kiss from Xavier. Sebastian relaxed and cupped Xavier's cheek as Xavier moaned in delight.

They pulled apart with heavy breathing and Xavier gasping "Oh my god, I can't believe I jut kissed my crush." Sebastian chuckled as he led them both to his bedroom.

The two quickly took off their clothes and lay down naked on Sebastian's bed. They kissed for a few minutes passionately until Xavier started kissing Sebastian's neck. Xavier then lowered his head and took Sebastian's erect penis in his mouth. Sebastian moaned loudly. After a few minutes Sebastian said "Let's change our positions." The two now lay down with each other's penis' in their mouths and continued to suck. As both sucked they each slid fingers in eachother's ass', causing both to moan loudly. After a while, Sebastian moved to his drawer's and grapped a condom, "Can I?" He asked, earning a loud "YES!" From Xavier, causing Sebastian to chuckle. Sebastian put the condom on and slid his cock in Xavier's ass. "Oh yes!" Xavier moaned. Sebastian started slow and gentle but after some dirty talk from Xavier, proceeded to thrust fast and rough. "Oh Seb" Xavier whined as Sebastian came, quickly follwed by Xavier cumming. The two now sweaty men breathed fast and heavy, and Sebastian leaned down to kiss Xavier's lips gently.

A few minutes had now passed and the two were under the duvet. Xavier leaned his head on Sebastian's bre chest as Sebastian held Xavier in his arms.

"So...I was not expecting that to happen tonight. Bloody amazing though." Xavier said, earning a chuckle from Sebastian. "I do love you laugh Seb."

Sebastian kissed Xavier on his forehead, "I enjoyed that too."

Xavier then asked, "So you gay, bi, pan etc?"

"Bi. Know one else knows though, not even my family and close friends."

"Why?" Xavier asked.

Sebastian sighed "I'm not ashamed of being bi, not in the slightest. But i'm scared of others finding out. Being an actor has been my dream for my entire life and i've now achieved so much in my career. But Hollywood tells you won't ever get good roles again if you come out. I want to be brave like you Xavier but I know many other actors who have told me Hollywood would never treat an out LGBT actor the same as a straight one. Plus the franchise i'm most known for is Marvel, did you see how the internet trolls reacted to fictional characters from Black Panther, Ant-Man and The Wasp and Captain Marvel? They would destory me if they found out I was bisexual and I honestly don't think i'm mentally prepared for that." He started to tear up.

Xavier consoled him "No no, Seb don't cry. You have nothing to be ashamed of. I understand. I'm lucky that being gay hasn't affected my career but then i'm not a action hero and a heartthrob. I know many closeted actors and they feel the same way you do, Hollywood is such a toxic place. And don't you worry, your secret is safe with me." He gave Sebastian a quick kiss on the lips.

Sebastian blushed. "You know, when I first realised you had a crush on me when I saw that instagram post years ago, I really was flattered. And I kinda had a crush on you too" Earning a gasp from Xavier. "When we first met at the 'I Tonya' premiere, I really liked you but of course we've never had the chance to catch up. Then we met at the party not too long ago and as we talking I realised I really wanted to know you more. Jessica would tell me so much about you and everything she said was right. As we spent the past few weeks chatting by text and DMs, I really was getting fond of you."

Xavier was beaming, "I still can't believe my crush likes me the same way!" He chuckled.

Sebastian then asked shyly "So Xavier, what i'm trying to say is...do you want to go on a date?"

Xavier responded by giving Sebastian a long, hard, passionate kiss. Sebastian chuckled "I take that as a yes then!" The two then spent the rest of the night asleep in a embrace.


	5. First date.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for their first date!

A few days later, and it was now date night. Xavier and Sebastian were due to meet at the restaraunt the went to last time. Xavier was incredibly nervous, he really didn't want to screw this up, it wasn't every day you got to date your crush. Like the other day, he wasn't going to fuss too much on his look, he just hopes he looks decent for tonight. He has been really excited for the date (although he hasn't told anyone about it).

After having a shower, changing into some casual clothes and combing his hair, Xavier booked a taxi. The taxi eventually arrived but as he got in, Xavier started to get nervous. He spent the journey to the restaraunt shaking, sweating and breathing heavily. The driver asked if he was alright and Xavier insisted he was, but he really wasn't. Xavier enver really got this nervous especially on a daate so he didn't know why he was so scared. He just didn't want to mess this up, what if tonight ends upas a disaster and Sebastian never wants to see him again?

Before he knew it, Xavier had arrived at the restaraunt. He thanked and paid the driver and left the car to see a smiling Sebastian waiting for him. "Hey Xavier" Sebastian greeted.

"Hi Sebastian!" Xavier's nerves caused him to squeak the sentance out like a mouse, earning a small laugh from Seabstian.

"Ready to go inside?"

"Of course."

The two sat down and ordered their meal and drinks. The room was just as busy and pretty just like the last time they were here. And thankfully, it seemed no one in the room recognised them.

"I still can't believe you've asked me out for a date" Xavier admitted, "But i'm glad you did, I really like spending time with you." He said fondly.

Sebastian smiled and repsonded with "Same here, I can't really describe it, but I love the feeling I get when i'm with you. I must warn you though, i've never been on a date with a man before, so i'm kinda new to this."

"Don't worry, it's just like dating a girl. Although instead I have a penis." The two roared with laughter.

Xavier then said "Truth be told, i'm kinda nervous too. I've never exactly had a great track record with dates."

Sebastian smiled "Glad i'm not the only one."

The two spent the night talking about pretty much everything as they ate and drank.

Xavier said "Looking back, i'm sorry if those instagram posts freaked you out. I can get a little...honest at times."

Sebastian laughed "It's fine, I found it very flattering and it was very tame compared to some of the things i've seen online. The truth is when I first saw you I kinda had a crush on you as well." He admitted.

"REALLY!?"

"Yes, I thought you were really cute." Sebastian said, causing Xavier to blush a dark shade of red. "I couldn't really tell you due to me not being out, i've wanted to tell you for a long time."

"Wow...I never thought someone would ever feel that way about me to be honest."

"Why? You're good looking, talented and have a great personality."

"Okay Sebastian, you're going to make me swoon with all of these flatteries."

Sebastian chuckled "Now you know what it's like to be the one receiving the flirting."

Xavier changed the subject "So what have done with men before?"

"Just kissing, you were actually my frist time sleeping with a guy."

"I'm honoured" Xavier said with his best 'sexy face look.'

Sebastian giggled "Oh god, I love your sense of humor."

"You have great taste!"

The two finished their meal and began walking around the street. It was nighttime and the lights from the buildings and shops made the view look kinda beautiful, like from a romantic movie. They were quite a few people on the street with them, but Xavier didn't really notice.

Xavier could proudly say that this was one of the best nights of his life. It sounded ridiculous considering he's only been on one official date with Sebastian, but he was really falling for him, he had never felt this way about anyone before. He was so smitten with this man. Xavier couldn't help it, he used his hand to try and link with Sebastian's, wanting to hold hands with him so badly. The moment he touched Sebastian's hand, Sebastian flinched his hand away. Xavier was confused but tried again. Xavier reached Sebastian's hand, but Sebastian swiped his hand away and snapped "No! Stop it!"

Xavier was confused and a little bit hurt. Sebastian's eyes widen and genuine regret showed on his face "Oh Xavier i'm so sorry, I didn't mean to, i've ruined everything" He cried as he ran away.

Xavier shouted "Wait! Sebastian!" As he ran after him.

Sebastian was a lot faster than Xavier, but Xavier eventually found him behind a alleyway, crouching against the wall and sobbing.

"Hey hey, don't cry" Xavier crouched down and Sebastian quickly wrapped his arms around him and hugged him tight.

"I'm so sorry Xavier, i'm so sorry I fucked everything up" Sebastian wailed.

"Ssh ssh, you haven't darling."

The two spent a few minutes cuddling together against the wall. Sebastian opened his mout and said with a shaky voice "I didn't mean to snap at you back then, it's just when you wanted to hold hands, I saw all of those people walking near us. I freaked out and I shouldn't of reacted like that, i'm so sorry."

Xavier now understood everything. "Oh my god Seb, i'm so stupid, this is all my fault."

"No it's not!"

"Yes it is. I know you're not out and that you're not ready for the public to know. Yet I still tried to do something that could've outed you, i'm so sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry about." Sebastian's voice continued to break "It's just that i'm scared Xavier. I'm not ashamed to be bisexual but i'm not brave like you, I know i'm not ready to be out yet, heck my family and friends don't know. I try to act like I don't care what people think about me, but the truth is I do. I see some cruel comments about me online, just imagine what that would be like if they knew I was bi. Plus being an actor has been my dream, I know many powerful people in Hollywood who would stop me getting roles because of who I date. But you know what scares me the most? Ruining your life Xavier."

Xavier was confused, "What do you mean Sebastian?"

Sebastian sighed, "I mean what if you wanted a proper relationship? To kiss, hug and hold hands in public, to live together, to marry, to have kids. I want to do that in the future but I have no idea when i'll come out Xavier, or if I even ever will. What if I never do and we date in secret? Or i get a fake girlfriend, leaving you in the shadows to be a secret to everyone? You don't deserve that Xa-"

Sebastian was silenced by a passionate kiss from Xavier. The two broke apart and Xavier said "I don't care Sebastian, I want to be with you, I care deeply for you. I know it'll be tough if you never come out or if you get a beard but this is my choice, I want to be with you. And I will support you" He then added "I'm with you till the end of the line."

Sebastian giggled "Quoting Marvel films now, you a fan?"

Xavier replied "Well I heard a really hot guy stars in them, plays someone called Bonky or Buddy or whatever" He joked. The two then shared another kiss.

Sebastian then said seriously "Are you sure about this Xavier? You know that a relationship with me may not be what you want? Secret dates, possible fake girlfriend, don't tell anybody etc."

"I'm support you no matter what."

Sebastian then cupped Xavier's cheek and said "Well then Xavier Dolan, that leaves just one more question, will you be my boyfriend?"

Xavier quickly replied "Yes!" And gave a massive kiss to Sebastian's lips.

Both Xavier and Sebastian were incredibly happy at that moment. They knew this relationship wasn't going to be easy, but Xavier didn't want to force Sebastian to be out of the closet and wanted him to only do it if when or if he felt comfortable doing so. The two went back to Sebastian's house for sex. As the morning began, they woke up with Sebastian saying "Good morning boyfriend."

Xavier smiled "I can get used to this."


	6. The Falcon and The Winter Soldier.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian gets ready to start filming his new show.

Sebastian and Xavier were cuddling in bed together for what would be the last chance they would get for quite a while as Sebastian was leaving in the morning to film his new Disney+ show 'The Falcon and The Winter Soldier.'

"I don't want you to go" Xaiver whined as he rested his head on Sebastian's bare chest.

Sebastian stroked Xavier's hair as he replied "Me either, it's gonna kill me not being with you."

"We'll contact everyday though, right?" Xavier pleaded with puppy like eyes.

Sebastian smiled and kissed Xavier's head "Of course, It'll be the highlight of my day."

"I'm so happy for you Sebastian, this show is going to be huge! I hope you have fun filming. Maybe steal something from the set for me?" Xavier cheekily smiled, causing Sebastian to loudly laugh.

It was morning and it was the moment the two were dreading-Sebastian had to leave.

Xavier tried to lighten the mood with a joke, "Well at least the sex last night was the best one so far...sorry i'm not very good at trying to lighten up the mood."

"I'm going to miss your awful jokes Xavier" Sebastian sniffed as hugged Xavier tight, not wanting to let go. After what seemed like forever, the two shared a long, passionate kiss.

"Goodbye Sebastian."

"Goodbye Xavier, i'll be back before you know it." The moment Sebastian closed the door, Xavier began to cry.

A few days later and Sebastian had already settled in filming his new show. A lot of the cast and crew were familiar so it was very easy getting back into role. Plus he loves working with Anthony Mackie and the two have been incredibly close for years. As much as he was loving his new role, he couldn't deny he was sad not being with Xavier, although he hoped no one else had noticed his mood. It did help though that the day filming had started, he and Xavier had made sure to contact each other at least once a day, whether it was by phone call or text or email etc.

It was a long day of filming but there was still many more hours to work on. A lot of the cast and crew were admittedly a little tired, so the director called for a hour long break.

Sebastian and Anthony normally spent their breaks together, so the two went alone to a trailer. The two began catching up and sharing jokes.

"Your Halloween sounded cray pal."

"Tell me again mate." The two shared a laugh.

Anthony (who was sat across from Sebastian) got a notification from his phone, "Got a text from the kids, just gonna reply."

"Take as long as you need Anthony."

As Anthony was too distracted by his phone, Sebastian thought it would be a good time to text Xavier.

'Hey Xavier, i'm currently on a break, what's up?'

'Hey Sebastian :) i'm fine thx, u enjoying it?'

'I'm loving it! It's so much fun and i'm loving every second of it! I miss u tho :('

'I miss u too xxxxxxx Maybe later we can skype? Kinda horny.

Sebastian giggled and Anthony quickly glanced at Sebastian, but went back to his own phone (although he was wondering who Sebastian was texting).

'Naughty!'

'Oh come on Sebastian, I know you feel the same ;)'

'I suppose I could later as i'm not alone atm.'

'Well i'm alone, I gotta go now hun but here's a little treat for u, more later ;) xxxxxx' And with that message came a very revealing photo of Xavier, causing Sebastian to blush a heavy shade of red on both of his cheeks.

Anthony looked up and smiled as he saw the look on Sebastian's face, "So, who's the lucky girl?"

Sebastian's heart missed a beat, "Wh...wha...what do you mean?!"

"You have a girlfriend now don't you?"

Sebastian felt like he was going to faint any second, "No,no,no!"

"Oh come on dude, you've been on your phone smiling and blushing the moment we started filming here, who is she? Do I know her? How long have you two been dating? Is it serious? Is she 'the one'?"

Sebastian nerves were overwhelming him. He trusted Anthony and he wanted to tell him the truth he really did, but he was so scared. Without thinking, Sebastian was shaking and tears were leaking from his eyes.

Anthony's smile instantly dropped and he ran over to put his arm around Sebastian. "Mate, mate i'm sorry! I was just kidding, please don't be upset."

Sebastian quickly calmed and down and told Anthony a lie "Sorry Anthony, just texting with a friend who's had a tough time, they sent me a joke that cheered me up is all."

"Mate i'm sorry"

"No don't be! It's fine, honestly!"

The two quickly forgot about the incident and went back to sharing jokes and chatting, before they were told that fiming was about to resume.

It was the end of the day and Sebastian was getting ready for bed (and he was very tired).

He felt a little embarassed to be honest. He had assured Anthony all day he was fine, but he was so scared. Anthony thought he had a girlfriend and that made him realise just how hard his relationship with Xavier is going to be kept secret. It also didn't help that his feelings for Xavier grew stronger everyday, he had never felt that way about anyone before.

Xavier wanted to tell the world about him and Xavier but he was just so scared of how people will react. Sebastian realised he needed cheering up before he went to sleep, so he skyped Xavier.

"Hey Seb!" Xavier was clearly delighted to see Sebastian's face.

Sebastian's face immediately warmed up and he couldn't hide the wide grin on his face. "Hey Xavier, i've missed you so much. You okay to talk now?"

Xavier beamed a smile back at him, "I've missed you too and yes, I would love to talk now."

After their conversation, Sebastian ended the day very happy.


	7. Mom.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Xavier has a talk with his mother.

For the next few days, Xavier and Sebastian continued to text the moment they had free time (even if that free time was brief).

Xavier was reading a article which showed a new look for Sebastian's character 'Bucky Barnes.' He sent the link to Sebastian and texted 'Saw this cutie online, he's very handsome ;)'

Sebastian texted back 'Is he now? I'm sure he's very flattered xxxx'

'There's a lot of things I would do to that man.'

'XAVIER!'

'You would enjoy it :)'

'You know me so well.'

Xaiver then texted 'I miss you.'

Sebastian texted back 'I miss you too.'

One day later and Xavier had a free day so decided to spend it with his mother Genevieve. The two always had a very close relationship.

"I'm just going to make some tea, do you want the usual?" Xavier nodded so Genevieve responded with "Okay, I won't be too long."

That left Xavier alone in the living room, so he decided to text Sebastian.

'Hey Sebastian, you free?'

'For a minutes yeah, you good?'

'Spending time with my Mom.'

'Aww that's nice.'

'How has your day been?'

'It's been great! Mackie tripped over while filming and I still can't stop laughing about it, he's not very happy lol.'

'I bet he's not lol!'

Xavier then cheekily asked 'Can you give me any spoilers yet?'

Sebastian texted back 'You know I can't, Marvel and Disney would murder me.'

'Yeah, we don't want you to get killed by Mickey Mouse.'

'Geez thanks, now i'm going to get nightmares about being murdered by a psycho mouse.'

Xavier laughed and texted 'God that made laugh so much!'

Sebastian texted back 'Good, I love your laugh :)'

Xavier blushed a dark shade of red on both cheeks and that exact moment his mother came back in the room with two cups of tea. Both were silent until Genevieve put both cups on the coffee table and sat down next to Xavier and asked "So, who are you talking to?"

"Oh...just a friend."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Then why have you blushing on your phone all day? You've also been very quiet and secretive lately."

"Umm..."

"You don't need to lie to me, you can tell me. Is this person more than a friend?"

Xavier didn't want to lie to his Mom, so answered "...yeah."

"That's wonderful sweetie, i'm so glad you're seeing someone. What's his name? Tell me about him!"

"I...I...I can't."

"Why not?"

"He's a famous actor...and he's not out to anyone but me yet."

"Ah."

The two sat in silence for some time before Genevieve spoke up and said "Are you sure about this?"

"Huh? About what?"

"Having a relationship in secret?"

"Yes, i've discussed it with him and i'm completely fine with it."

"But are you really fine with it? Can you really have a relationship wth someone in secret?"

"Well we've been dating for a few weeks now and it's been fine."

"But what about the future Xavier? The poor guy will be scared of being outed so you both can't be open with everyone. What if he's told to date and eventually marry a girl to avoid getting outed, how would that make you feel? Can you really cope with that?"

"I...I...I..."

"And what happens when you realise this is the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with? What happens if you want to marry him and start a family with him, but you can't as it would be too hard to do so in secret?"

Xavier didn't know what to say.

Genevieve asked "You like this guy, don't you?"

Xavier broke down in tears and said "Yes" a his mother cradled him, "But you're right Mom, what do I do?"

"There there sweetie" she cooed, "I'm glad he makes you happy, that makes me happy. I'm afraid I can't tell you what to do son, tha'ts your decision to make. Don't rush it thought, take your time making up your mind, but I hope you both have a long future ahead, I love how happy he's made you lately."

"Yeah, i've loved spending time with him, he's so different to other guys i've been with."

"That's nice, am I allowed to know who he is or..."

"I trust you would keep it secret Mom, but I promised him I wouldn't tell anyone."

"That's completely fair, he has every right to feel that way."

"Thanks Mom."

"Now dry your tears and then we can watch a movie together!"

"Okay, but I get to pick which film we watch!"

Xavier had a great day with his Mom. As he went to bed that night, he just had to talk with Sebastian, so he rang his number.

Sebastian answered the call and said "Xavier! I'm so glad you've called, i've missed your voice!"

Xavier smiled "Me too" he sniffed.

"Xavier are you crying!?"

"It's nothing to worry about, it's just been one of those days. I want to hear about your day."

"Okay." Sebastian responded as Xavier smiled at every word Sebastian said as he explained his day.


	8. Bad day.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a disastrous day for Sebastian, as he gets some bad news.

Sebastian was continuing filming 'The Falcon and The Winter Soldier' and was having a blast. It had quickly already become one of his favourite projects he has worked on and he can't wait for the world to see it.

"You're looking very happy" Anthony said.

"I am happy" Sebastian smiled as he replied. It was true, he was very happy with his life at the moment. His career was doing great, he was having fun filming his own show and most importantly he was in a loving relationship.

The two were filming scenes that were pretty energetic. Sebastian actually quite enjoyed doing some stunts (although he wasn't allowed to do many). He exercises regulary so filming scenes that required a lot of running or fighting were pretty easy for him.

After an hour of filming, Sebastian noticed the director talking to a man in a suit. She then walked to Sebastian and told him he was needed to be speaken to urgently. Sebastian went to the location he was told to go. He then arrived in a room with a table with three people sitting behind it.

"Sit" said the man in the middle.

Sebastian offered his hand to shake the three people rudely refused so he sat down on the chair opposite them. Sebastian then realised that none of them were polite enough to introduce themselevs-he didn't even know their names! So Sebastian's mind would just refer to the woman on the left 'Lady', the scary and intimidating man in the middle 'Scary' and the bald man on the left 'Baldy'.

"Hi" Sebastian greeted and was once again greeteed with silence. "Um...so...why am I here-"

"Let's cut to the chase" Scary rudely interrupted, "You probably don't remember us but we're all from your managament team, we know we've hardly ever interacted but we're here to discuss something important with you-we know about your boyfriend."

"WHAT!?" Sebastian's heart skipped a beat.

"You lost your phone one night and someone from the crew of your show found it and discovered texts and photos which proves you're in a relationship with a man."

Sebastian was angry and hurt, "Someone looked through my phone?! They had no right to do that!"

"Stop shouting and let's talk like adults" Scary said, "Let's be grateful only one person found out, we don't need anyone else to discover your secret."

Baldy said "For starters, you cannot be seen in public with this man."

Lady said "It might also help if we find a girlfriend for you."

"But-" Sebastian tried to say.

"No buts!" Scary said, "We're doing this all for you, this is to save your career!"

Sebastian responded with "I can't do that! I can't be in a fake relationship while i'm in a honest one! I won't do that to Xavier."

Lady rolled her eyes and said "Look that's lovely and all but your career is more important than some queer."

"Don't talk about him like that!" Sebastian snapped.

Baldy said "Fine, we can see you're against the girlfriend idea so we'll drop it-for now. Eventually we will find someone for you to date and you will keep your boyfriend a secret!"

"I don't feel comfortable with this" Sebastian admitted.

"Fine, then come out" Baldy challenged.

"I...I can't" Sebastian whimpered.

"Well then you obviously don't care too much about your boyfriend then" Scary taunted, followed by chuckles from Lady and Baldy.

"Look" Sebastian interrupted, "I want to do this my way, this should be my choice to make. I don't want people making decisions on my life."

"We're in charge here" Scary threatened, "We can end your career as quickly as a the snap of the fingers, you might want to think carefully about this."

"You need to constantly talk about how you're looking for a girlfriend when asked about your private life in interviews" Lady ordered.

Baldy chimed in "And keep choosing roles that require you have a female love interest. No more gay roles."

"We will continue to contact you regulary about this, we'll make sure to sort this mess out. You can go now" Scary dismissed Sebastian, with Sebastian leaving the room shaking.

Sebastian spent that night tearfully recalling his days events to Xavier over the phone.

"Oh Sebastian i'm so sorry sweetie."

"I don't know what to do" Sebastian admitted.

"Do whatever you want to do."

"I'm not ready to come out, but i'm not losing you. I don't want a fake relationship."

"I'll support with whatever choice you make."

The two spent the next hour just talking and it made Sebastian calm down. While today was mostly not a happy day, it was moments like now that made him happy.


End file.
